The darkness is a companion to the heavy minded like no other. In all my eighty years, one companion had never left me, and that was none other than myself. The thoughts of my tormented night had never left me, even in the middle of the night; even when I didn’t want them there. They were like ghosts that haunted me, even though it was by me, whispering into my ears. I often kept my demons locked up. There were skeletons in my closet that no one knew about. People had tried, but I was never too keen on the idea of friendship or that of being close to people. From a very young age, people had told me to not stay up too long; it wasn’t to be well rested, it was because while defending our castles of insecurities in the depths of the morbid night we often succumbed to its heightened strength, its blackness. Fear, fear driven nights; the sorry lives of human beings with their ailments. I never had any of that shit. I couldn’t give more of a fuck about locking up my insecurities. I made it a part of me, I let it mould me. It was my acceptance of my deepest insecurities that made me who I am. I didn’t need a friend or a companion to soothe me or to tell me it would be okay. I knew how it would turn out; I knew how the sugar-coated lie of life was eventually going to fall on its knees to the bitter truth of death. I dreamt about it, vivid dreams. They were the most bona fide dreams I ever had and yet those were the only dreams I believed. However, I had imagined that it would come faster than this. Eighty years on this godforsaken planet spent accumulating money and spending it on things I didn’t need, for what? To die one day and leave it all behind to no one? I did not know what my maker was punishing me for.
It felt like another night, like any other. These thoughts were my nightly companions, aside from my Cubans. A mansion all to myself and not a single light shone when the sun went down for its slumber. As the night grew darker however, something felt off. I was draped in my silver crested robe –yet another unnecessary spending to help pass my time on this desolate place I called home. Why would I need any of it? Most of my sorry life, I had dwelled inside my mind. I was puffing away when I heard it; it felt like one of my dreams, so vivid. The winds blew stronger and the windows began to shake. It was dark, as it always was, but I could still feel him creeping up to me, near me. My hands started shaking as I continued to puff away, my breaths drew shorter. Then I heard him. It was like a screech in my ears. The screeching hurt when I first saw him, it had been just like my dreams. He was an angel in black, towering over me. I had thought upon this night for so long. I had imagined myself in my room, all alone and holding on to dear life as I was being dragged into the gaping abyss. However, now that he was here, it felt different. I knew I had already overstayed my welcome in this place; I didn’t need to be here anymore. Who would I live for? I was an old man who was too bleak a soul to want to share his sorrows with anyone. I couldn’t stand the idea of sharing a single conversation with anyone, let alone for the rest of my life. I felt myself tearing away. It felt as if a thousand cacti were being dragged against my skin. Impalpable pain ; I didn’t hold on any longer. My lungs gave away, my throat collapsed upon itself. It felt like my eyes were being gouged out of their sockets and my intestines churned painfully inside my belly. It felt like a déjà vu, like every night I ever imagined for as long as I could remember. The glass of whiskey was the first to fall. My body fell to the ground as he took me away. It was over, the overdue stay of my tormented soul had finally come to an end.
Story by No Names Kareem
Artwork by Lady Night
It felt like another night, like any other. These thoughts were my nightly companions, aside from my Cubans. A mansion all to myself and not a single light shone when the sun went down for its slumber. As the night grew darker however, something felt off. I was draped in my silver crested robe –yet another unnecessary spending to help pass my time on this desolate place I called home. Why would I need any of it? Most of my sorry life, I had dwelled inside my mind. I was puffing away when I heard it; it felt like one of my dreams, so vivid. The winds blew stronger and the windows began to shake. It was dark, as it always was, but I could still feel him creeping up to me, near me. My hands started shaking as I continued to puff away, my breaths drew shorter. Then I heard him. It was like a screech in my ears. The screeching hurt when I first saw him, it had been just like my dreams. He was an angel in black, towering over me. I had thought upon this night for so long. I had imagined myself in my room, all alone and holding on to dear life as I was being dragged into the gaping abyss. However, now that he was here, it felt different. I knew I had already overstayed my welcome in this place; I didn’t need to be here anymore. Who would I live for? I was an old man who was too bleak a soul to want to share his sorrows with anyone. I couldn’t stand the idea of sharing a single conversation with anyone, let alone for the rest of my life. I felt myself tearing away. It felt as if a thousand cacti were being dragged against my skin. Impalpable pain ; I didn’t hold on any longer. My lungs gave away, my throat collapsed upon itself. It felt like my eyes were being gouged out of their sockets and my intestines churned painfully inside my belly. It felt like a déjà vu, like every night I ever imagined for as long as I could remember. The glass of whiskey was the first to fall. My body fell to the ground as he took me away. It was over, the overdue stay of my tormented soul had finally come to an end.
Story by No Names Kareem
Artwork by Lady Night
